Overwelmed= it pushes me to press closer to his chest.

"You know me
i want to know you too
and in your eyes
be found beautiful.

and i
have tried
all night
to make you want me
to make me worth your time

but- you already love me
you already do
you already want me
it's already true."

I am at this point were everything is overwelming and i just can't handle it. It's so beautiful, it pushes me to turn my gaze to the Lord, my provider and helper, my sustainer. I am in this ridiculous war to earn Jesus, to earn grace, to prove to him i'm worth it, something good, something impressive. To lean on my own ability and not his.

ha.

It doesn't work. I need him. I need him. Jesus is my righteousness.

Overwelmed pushes me to press closer to his chest.
Overwelmed pushes me to press closer to his chest.

So really, it's a gift. All these aches and pains are what i asked for. To know you, to be closer, to be everything you dreamed me up to be.

blog blog. write write.

THE OCEAN AND THE TIDE
ARE MAKING MUSIC IN THE NIGHT
AND IT'S A BATTLE I CAN FIGHT
BUT NEVER WIN
ALONE, WAGING WAR AGANIST MY SIN.
i need.

Sometimes i want to just sit around with alot of tattooed periced-up muscian kids who wear plaid and tie dye, make art and music and get to know Jesus better with them (aka- ZHOP goers!). Those are the kinda people who catch my eye at the mall. except that the ones at the mall are probably on drugs and whatnot...but anyhow, the creativity can be so beautiful.

I like Shane&Shane.
Waging War: 41 plays
all by me. :)

I just wanna make you move.

one.
two.


"you've got rumors rolling off your tongue
your superstitions sweetly sung
the effort is what made it effortless
and I'm carving questions
on the walls of your aching lungs."

I do not understand grace.
I decide it's not for me, sometimes,
i focus on simply being better for you,
i focus on my failures,
instead of you.

mmmmm.

well. recently-
i need Jesus.

how cool kids do.

I've heard sweetly sung superstitions.

Helllllo Roughhh Draffft.

I've heard
Love is blind and cannot see
the vastness of the gap between
your distress and my relief
or what you're saying as i think.

I've heard
Love is numb and cannot feel
believing what's been proven unreal
searching for what it cannot find
finding the unexistant in your eyes.

I've heard
Love is deaf and cannot hear
what's been stated loud and clear
it's not afraid to fight,
assumes it's in the right.

I've heard
Love is deaf, blind, and dumb
a child sneaking his father's rum
undoing all that has been done
to keep him safe.

I've heard
love is lust and
gave itself another name.

I've heard
perfect love-it casts out fear
it teaches you to trust
doesn't decay or rust
away by the end.

"The collision of your eyes and mine
send me reeling, seaching for a sign
that i just can not find."

Beauty of God.

i LOVE this.
the Dusty Car Song (the Beauty of God)

Beauty.

I love you, oh LORD, my strengh.
-psalms.

"were you fashioned to make me fall,
were you fashioned to make me look like a fool?
were you fashioned to make me weak?
because i am even now as we speak.

fading- winter to spring.
waiting- can change alot of things,
can change alot of things.
fading- winter to spring
waiting- can be a good thing,
can be a good thing.

i'm not yours;
you're not mine."

Two Cents

Well.
I think that mature love wants what's best for the other person, even if it hurts the one who loves immensely. Or both of them. Even when it doesn't make any sense to the one making hurt.
i.e. GET OUT OF THE STREET, DARLING!
Pulling away from someone, making bounderies. Even when it doesn't make sense to the other person. Or hurts.
i.e. I DIED FOR YOU. AND YOU DIDN'T WANT ME TO DIE EITHER. BUT YOU SAW IN THE END THAT IT WAS GOOD. (JESUS)

Love wants to see what it can give, and not just what it can get.
Love helps.
And doesn't pressue.
Doesn't insist on having it's own way.
Defends, protects, gaurds, cares.
SELFLESS.
i.e. JESUS.